Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
