sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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