And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
