apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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