after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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