Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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