This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize