Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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