We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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