he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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