All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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