I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
