Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize