i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Ladies don't puke and tell
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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