no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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