There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
