You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
