I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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