By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
