they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
