can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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