she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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