i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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