Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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