well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
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