he puts the penis in happiness.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Randomize
