i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
This toilet bowl is my home.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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