brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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