I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
