so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
