ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
this just has baby written all over it
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
