How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
