I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Randomize
