Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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