the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Randomize
