I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize