I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
