I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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