She announced her abortion via fbk
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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