how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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