Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
