Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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