i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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