I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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