"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I will die if light touches me.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
