She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
