you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Randomize
