Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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