Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
It's rum buckets o'clock
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
