My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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